Of all the striking things about Seinfeld’s gang, the one that particularly stands out is the show’s focus on four characters who remained single until the very end. While there’s nothing wrong about that, this particular ragtag pack of misfits changed their opinions about relationships all the time, much to the annoyance of Seinfeld fans.
Time after time, they would end things for the stupidest of reasons, or worse, derail the lives of their partners. There are many reasons why many of the romances in Seinfeld failed. Whilst a few of them are valid, the rest are a bit out there, at best.
Because Jerry’s Girlfriend Margaret Used To Date Newman
Jerry wasn’t able to get past the fact that his girlfriend Margaret dated his neighbor, Newman, in the past. Even though she hesitated to talk about it, Jerry became too inquisitive and dragged it out of her. Later, at Monk’s Cafe, the man admitted to Elaine that the most distressing part about the revelation was that Newman was the one who had stopped seeing Margaret and not the other way around.
Jerry’s entitled behavior got worse, so much so that he knocked on Newman’s door and demand to know what had happened between him and Margaret. He fixated on every minute detail and after failing to reconcile with his partner’s past, he broke things off with her.
Because George Lost A Chess Game
Trust George Costanza to end things with a woman after losing to her in a game of chess. Season 7 opened with George playing chess with an unnamed girlfriend, who checkmated him in a quiet move. It was clear George lacked chess etiquette – he was loud and critiqued her moves while she focussed on the game all the while.
After being defeated, the words, “I don’t think we should see each other anymore” came out of his mouth. George’s admission of being “completely emasculated” was clearly a wrong reason to break up and a sign he hadn’t put enough effort into this relationship.
Because Jerry Was Sushed While Watching TV
In the same episode, when Jerry asserted that George was a superficial person, the latter promptly countered his claim, saying that the same criticism applied equally to him.
“You just broke up with Melanie last week because she shushed you while you were watching TV,” revealed George. In response, Jerry got defensive, raised his arms, and said, “Hey, I got a real thing about shushing.” As shallow as these reasons were, the episode would be one of the rare times when the two friends had an epiphany and admitted they were emotionally immature adults.
Because Jerry’s Girlfriend At Her Peas “Wrong”
Jerry straightened things out with Melanie one last time before calling it quits because, while she scooped her corn niblets at dinner, she ate her peas one at a time. Perhaps Melaine was savoring her peas, but Jerry would rather she eat them “normally” rather than waiting for her to enjoy her meal.
Of course, all of this also meant that Melanie was dating an impatient person in Jerry, not to mention someone who was self-involved and unlikely to be responsive to her needs. All through Seinfeld, Jerry kept bumping into amazing women and then looked for silly reasons to break up with them.
Because Kramer’s Girlfriend Changed Her Hairstyle
Seinfeld‘s main gang liked being around attractive people and if circumstances allowed, dating them too. Wendy from “The Kiss Hello” was one such example. Though Kramer was brought in to comment on Wendy’s 1960s style haircut and get her to change it, he ended up going out with her because of the very same reason.
And when Wendy did change her hairstyle in the end, Kramer called the whole thing off. Finding someone physically attractive is of course the first stage of a relationship, but Kramer’s sole obsession with Wendy’s hairdo meant he quite a ways away from establishing a healthy dynamic.
Because Tia Thought Jerry Was Picking His Nose
Jerry and Tia Van Camp’s airplane meet-cute was quite heartwarming, but she dumped him shortly afterward for picking his nose. Though Jerry maintained it was a scratch and not a pick, for Tia, it was a deal-breaker. The two could have made a power couple had Jerry not been caught in the act and/or not given a fair chance to explain himself.
Granted it wasn’t the best of reasons to break up with someone, but since Jerry has dumped so many women on ridiculous grounds, he had it coming. All hail Tia for giving Jerry a taste of his own medicine.
Because Elain’s Boyfriend Was “Too Nice”
Elaine went out with a guy named Aaron in season 5’s “The Raincoats” and the two seemed to get along well. But their relationship came to an end in the span of the two-parter episode itself – all because Aaron was incredibly nice to Jerry’s parents, Morty and Helen. Although Elaine had no problem whatsoever with Aaron getting into people’s personal space while speaking to them, she did have a problem with him being too nice to the Seinfelds.
Fans were less than pleased with this breakup, and often wonder what if Elaine liked Aaron for who he was i.e a genuinely nice person who was interested in getting to know the Seinfelds.
Because Elaine’s Boyfriend’s Accident Changed His Appearance
Elaine’s ex, Tony, was an extreme athlete and a charismatic person with more than just a pretty face whose rock-climbing invitation to George and Kramer almost cost him his life.
As a result of their total negligence in securing his climbing rope, he fell off the mountain, sustained major facial injuries, and got dumped by Elaine. Only in the world of Seinfeld would a character vehemently make claims about personality over appearance and then proceed to do quite the opposite.
Because Jerry Couldn’t Handle The Pressure Of A Pretend Marriage
For a couple that was pretty solid and kept an “I-love-you” count, surprisingly, Meryl and Jerry’s relationship crumbled under the pressure of a pretend marriage. Courteney Cox appeared as Meryl in season 5’s “The Wife.” As the titular character of said episode, she dated Jerry briefly and pretended to be married to him to use his laundromat discount.
Eventually, there came a point when Jerry gave up on something great too soon, let another woman use his laundromat discount, and ended things with Meryl, saying he wasn’t ready for the responsibilities of a pretend marriage. Sure, he had every right to abstain from giving too much of himself in a new relationship, but fooling around with another woman on the side under the guise of a commitment issue? Come on, Jerry.
Because Of Arguing & Intimacy Issues. Or Was It?
When Jerry’s parents asked why their son stopped seeing Elaine in season 1’s “The Stake Out,” he answered them, saying, “Well, we fight a lot for some reason … and there was a little problem with the physical chemistry.” Valid reasons, except Jerry and Elaine still virtually spent all their time together, struck a deal to reestablish their amorous relationship in “The Deal,” and almost confessed their love to each other when they thought they were dying in a plane crash in the finale episode.
Fans were made to feel like something was off between Jerry and Elaine, while in reality, perhaps they just found each other a little too early in life. While fighting and intimacy issues are more than valid reasons for breaking off a relationship, maybe the two could have worked it all out, as many fans felt that they clearly belonged together.